The Missing Soldier - A Christmas Story
by WordsToShare
Summary: Korra is called off on a deployment. It's the holidays and Asami is worried because she hasn't heard from her in a while. Korrasami.


180 days…. That's what she told her. 180 days. When Korra told to her that she'd be leaving on a deployment, she instantly felt lost. 180 days. That was how long she was supposedly going to be in theatre in the Fire Nation. It was now day 189…

Asami understood the purpose of 180 days versus 6 months. It was a countdown that constantly moved forward. It was how they stayed sane, both in the worst parts of the world and at home. However, as soon as that last day passed and the numbers kept counting, the longing and anticipation immediately transitioned into fear and dread. Every knock at the door made her heart stop. It was awful.

The TV was playing some random TV show that she didn't even know what it was. The volume was turned low. Mostly it made for background noise to avoid the darkness she felt when she sat in silence. She was staring into her cup of tea, which had gone cold by now. Bolin had come by a little while ago to check on her, forcing her to eat and drink something.

"What if she never comes back?"

"She'll be back," Bolin stated with a sense of optimism in his voice.

"But how do you know?"

"I just do. I won't believe anything else."

She slowly ate the sandwich he made in silence. Anything larger than a nibble made her stomach curl, particularly seeing as she hadn't eaten in days other than a cracker or two just to make her belly stop growling. It was doing enough flips as it was.

Bolin looked at his watch as she picked up her teacup. "I hate to leave you like this, but I have to go pick up Mako. Maybe this year we'll get another car for Christmas so he doesn't have to rely on me all the time." Asami chuckled. "I can see what I can do next time I'm in the office," she stated looking up at him. Never before had Bolin thought he'd see her so disheveled, and not in a good way. She was curled up on the couch in a pair of checkered pajama pants, sports bra and loose tank top. He made the assumption that she'd been in those clothes for several days by the way they looked crumpled and dirty. Her hair was pulled back with random strands sticking out all over the place. There was a dull shine giving the impression that she probably hadn't showered in days either. There wasn't a lick of makeup on her face. Instead it was replaced with dark circles and bags around her eyes. The edges of her mouth were turned down a bit, showing no signs of her usual laugh lines. He sighed to himself.

"Look, I know you're not taking care of yourself. I also know that you won't let me help you. I need you to get up and take a shower, put on some clean clothes, and at least act like life goes on, because it does. It's only been a few extra days. I asked around to some guys I know who enlisted and they said the deployment schedule doesn't account for travel time. It's boots on the ground. So there's a good chance she could walk through the door any day now. And I KNOW you don't want her to see you like this."

With a quick glance down and a shrug, she reluctantly agreed. "You're right. I'll get moving, I promise. Just… not yet. I'm going to finish my tea and watch a show then I'll get up."

Unfortunately, he knew he had to leave so accepted that answer. With a nod and a smile he turned around and headed toward the door of Asami and Korra's shared apartment. After opening the door and one foot out, he paused. "It's almost Christmas and we're not going to leave you alone. Everyone has decided to get together at our place. Everyone will be there – Tenzin, Pema, the kids, Lin, Kya, Opal, Suyin… It wouldn't be right if you weren't there. You never RSVP'd to our invite, but I'm telling you now that you're coming. No if's, and's or but's about it. Don't make me come over here and dress you myself. Got it?"

"I'll be there. Thank you, Bolin."

"Alright. We're all here for you. Just have a little faith," and with that he walked out and closed the door.

She has no idea how long it's been since he walked out. It must have been a while and she's been staring in that teacup since then. It remained untouched.

Christmas. The holidays were not on her side and she really wanted nothing to do with it.

Korra had written letters since she had been gone. There were stacks on the counter, the kitchen table and the coffee table in front of her. Ever since Korra left she had gotten letters every few days. Some days she even got multiples due to a backup in the mail system or because Korra missed her so much she wrote twice. Usually those letters started with '_I forgot something!_' But really, she knew she just missed their endless conversations and wanted to pretend that there was more than one piece of paper between them. Asami's heart fluttered every time she saw those words. Her heart fluttered anyways, but there was a little more to it in that. But, the letters stopped…

Thanksgiving was hard. She got a letter the day before and the day after. Having no mail delivered on the holiday was dreadful. It wasn't the same without her and not receiving anything made it that much more difficult. But she knew she'd have a letter in her hands the next day telling her all about some goofy game her unit would play in an effort to keep themselves in good spirits. Little did she know that it would be the last letter she'd receive.

The letter sat on the couch in front of her. There was nothing out of the ordinary in it. Nothing to say why she would stop writing. Normally, if her unit was going out on a run and she wouldn't be able to write for a few days, she'd detail anything and everything she could within certain limitations before sharing too much information. Korra would never go outside the wire without giving some kind of hint that she'd be silent for a time. This made her insides twist even more.

'Something happened, I know it,' she thought to herself. 'Korra would never leave me to worry like this.'

She put her teacup down and turned off the TV. With a slow shuffle of her feet, she made her way to the bedroom. There was a twinge of guilt as she knew she lied to Bolin. She couldn't get herself together right now. Instead, with little grace and elegance that was her usual way of moving about, she landed on her bed and crawled under the covers. Reaching a hand out, she grabbed Korra's pillow from her side of the bed and cradled it with her body. Her nose pressed into the fabric and breathed in, looking for the scent that the love of her life always left behind. It wasn't there. A tear rolled down her cheek as she nuzzled her face into the pillow. Silent sobs were the only thing she'd be greeted with tonight, as she knew sleep would never come.

A few days later it was Christmas Day. Opal had stopped by that morning to wake her and make sure she'd get ready for the gathering.

"Bolin had an idea that you wouldn't really get yourself together on your own. I figured you probably didn't want his help, so I'm here to take his place," Opal explained as Asami opened her front door with a look of terror on her face.

Each time a knock came she thought she'd be opening the door to a United Forces soldier, dressed in their formal attire, medals shimmering off their chest and a solemn look on their face. Every knock she expected to be handed a flag and told her love would never return. Every knock made her die a little inside. 'Note to self, find a way to rid the world of doors,' she silently pledged.

"Oh. Well, come on in. I'll put on some tea."

"Absolutely not," Opal sternly stated. "I'll put on tea while you go into the bathroom and take a shower. Honestly, when was the last time you bathed? It smells awful in here!"

"It's been a few days, I think." The glaze over Asami's eyes indicated she didn't know how long it had been, much less what day it was.

"Alright, well go get yourself cleaned up and I'll lay some clothes out for you. I'll be in the kitchen when you're done. If you want I can do your makeup and hair for you."

"That would be nice. Thanks, Opal." Asami turned around and headed towards the bathroom.

After a long shower, one in which the hot water had long run out before she stepped out, she made her way to the bedroom. Opal had laid out a nice, dark green dress that was knee length with no sleeves. She dried herself and started to get dressed, adding a white, waist height belt and a beautiful deep red cardigan sweater with a pair of matching red, flat, slip on shoes. She opened the bedroom door and called out "I'm done" and sat down in front of the mirror.

Opal walked in and asked "how do you want your hair done?" A shrug was all she received in response. So, she picked up a brush and got to work.

Asami sat there, feeling Opal's fingers as she pawed through her hair. It was a feeling she missed. Not from Opal, but the contact she longed for and had yet to experience in almost 200 days. Her shoulders relaxed a little and her eyes closed. Deep breathes filled her lungs several times over before she opened her eyes. As she did, they immediately fell upon a photograph that was framed on the table. It was from Christmas a few years ago. They were at a party with their friends at the time, enjoying the holidays surrounded by the people they loved. Enjoying the holidays with the _person_ they loved. Of all the people in the world, Mako was the one who caught that moment in a photo. They were sitting on the couch, Korra in the corner with one leg perched up and leaning against the back, the other slumped towards the floor. Asami sat between her legs, half of her back and shoulder slightly leaning into Korra while their feet were intertwined on the ground in front of them. Korra was leaning forward a bit, her chin over Asami's shoulder and her arms wrapped around her middle. They were both grinning ear to ear, stricken in a fit of laughter. Their heads were turned toward each other and eyes locked on the others. It was a beautiful moment, one they would never forget. Asami reached out and brushed a finger down the glass. A tear fell from her eye and the edge of her lips turned up in a brief smile as she thought of that moment. As she thought of _her_ Korra.

The party was going well and everyone was happy and smiling around her. Even she couldn't hold back the occasional smile as they shared stories and played games. Pema made a wonderful dinner that was spread along a long table where they could all see each other. Asami was in the middle of the table and looked around her, taking in the sight of her family. Although none of them were related by blood, they were her family none-the-less. Korra gave her that. She smiled to herself, thinking 'even if she never returns to me, she gave me a family and I could never be sad about that.'

After dinner was the tree lighting. The air kids zoomed around, arguing over who would get to put the angel on top of the tree. Tenzin grabbed Meelo's shoulder just before he ran into the tree having not been paying attention while sticking his tongue out at Ikki behind him. "I think we should let Asami put the angel on the tree this year," he said, looking over to Asami with a glint of fatherly love in his eyes. She smiled and nodded, walking over and taking the angel from Meelo's hands. He reluctantly gave in and let go. "I'd only give in to you, pretty lady," he stated with a cheesy grin that showed off a couple missing teeth. "Thanks, Meelo," she returned with a giggle.

Mako brought over a step stool and placed it at the bottom of the tree then held out a hand for Asami as she stepped up. She could feel everyone's eyes on her as she placed the angel on the tip of the tree. Bolin reached around the back of the tree, plugging the cord into the wall and illuminating the whole thing. Just at that moment, there was a knock at the door.

Asami didn't turn around in fear like she normally would. It wasn't her house so it couldn't have been for her. Instead, she stared at the glowing angel. 'Korra would have loved this,' she thought.

"Asami…"

She turned slightly at the sound of her name. She couldn't see who was there as the bodies of everyone in the room were blocking her view, but the sound of shoe taps clicking the floor were unmistakable. She stepped down, eyes wide as the people in front of her parted ways to let the clicking person make their way through. She looked down, seeing those perfectly shined shoes first. Her eyes slowly made their way up and over the perfectly creased pants without a slight imperfection. A little higher and she saw the buttons of a beautiful jacket, each one with the crest of the United Forces on it. Her eyes stopped at the medals. They hung there, perfectly aligned, straight as a arrow, while the metal of each just slightly clinked against each other.

Her knees went weak and she crumbled to the floor. She buried her face in her hands, fingers curling at the edge of her hair as she shook in panic. "No…" was the only word she could make out in barely a whisper.

Lin kneeled down next to her with a gentle hand placed on her back. "Asami… you need to look up."

"I cant…" she responded breathlessly after a few moments.

"I think you'll be surprised if you do."

With that, Asami turned her head slightly to look at Lin. She saw a warm smile as Lin's eyes flickered up to the uniformed person and back to Asami. She nodded in encouragement.

Slowly and with hesitant caution, Asami began to look up. A white-gloved hand was extended in front of her. Without looking at the face at the top of the uniform in front of her, she reached for the hand. It smoothly pulled her up, the fingers within the glove unrecognizable. She stumbled a little, unable to see very well through puffy eyes that she didn't even realize were pouring out tears on her face. She stood there for a moment, clinging to the hand that helped her and staring at the floor.

"Asami…"

That was it. The voice she had been waiting for. Her eyes darted up and met those bright baby blues that she could only see in her dreams. But now… now they were directly in front of her. In person. _Her person_. She started to shake and sob and strong arms wrapped around her, gripping onto her back as she was pulled into a loving embrace. Her forehead leaned down to rest on the shoulder in front of her. Tears fell onto the uniform that held her tight. She couldn't hear a thing except her own desperate cries and the breaths being taken close to her ear. It felt like that for a long time. No one moved. No one spoke. She closed her eyes, holding onto this moment because if she didn't it easily could have fallen away, never having existed, being a dream she didn't know she was having.

After a while feet began to shuffle. The sounds were falling into the distance, giving her the feeling that people were making their way out of the room to give them some privacy. She still hadn't opened her eyes, terrified that she'll wake up alone in her bed.

A hand gently gripped the back of her head and neck. The shoulder she leaned on dipped back and pulled away, just barely. Another hand brushed the side of her cheek, fingers lacing under her jaw with a small pressure that lifted her head.

"Open your eyes…"

"I don't want you to disappear," she choked out.

"Asami, I'm not going to disappear. Open your eyes."

A few more seconds passed by before she slowly opened the lids that blocked her girlfriend from view. Those baby blues now looked back at her, red lines overtaking the whites in her eyes as water glimmered around the edges. She lifted up her hands resting one on the chest of the solid uniform in front of her, and the other on the soft cheek before her eyes. Her thumb brushed her cheekbone as her eyes darted around the beautiful face she could clearly see now.

"Korra…"

Chapped lips met hers as her eyes closed again. It was a light kiss, lingering on for some time, neither girl wanting to pull away. She felt her heart beat for what felt like the first time, fast and heavy like it was going to explode out of her chest at any moment. She pulled back, wanting to look into those eyes again. But as she opened hers, she saw a head that bowed down, eyes closed as tears streamed down brown skin to the floor. It was Korra's turn to sob and Asami placed her lips upon the woman's forehead, pulling away to whisper "I love you."

"I'm so sorry. I couldn't tell you what happened. It was so fast. There was nothing I could do."

"Are you hurt?"

"My body was, but it's alright now. My heart never stopped hurting, though."

"You're here now. You're home."

"I'll always come home…"

With that Korra looked up into Asami's eyes again, love pouring out of them like she'd never seen before. "I will ALWAYS come home. I love you. Merry Christmas."

They shared one last passionate kiss in each other's embrace before rejoining the party, hand-in-hand. Home… She was finally home.


End file.
